Don't Care About Customer Care?

This is for all you poor souls who have developed spondylitis by walking around with your phone stuck under the crook of your neck, while you are kept on hold by the customer care service of some company or the other. I was introduced to the world of customer care when I started my professional life. There were suddenly cell phones, banks, credit cards - and their lovely customer care.

We all know, you have to go through tougher trials then Sita herself to reach one of these guys. All customer care numbers take you through hoops where you have keep pressing 1, 2 * and hence forth to keep in the right track. Until its finally revealed to you that if none of the already given choices are helping you, you can press so and so number to reach one of these elusive creatures called "Customer Care Representatives."

This is followed by a few moments of music therapy, where a jingle or inane soft music is played for your benefit, while you wait for an audience. Intermittently you are reminded that your call is important and don't hang up (never mind its been only half an hour since you called) or that you can get a free such and such stuff (for which you probably have contact these creatures in the future).

And finally you suddenly hear a human voice asking you how can he or she help you. Don't get fooled by that. 50% of the time they don't really mean it. Most of the time you know more then they do, sometimes they do know what you want but you have to resort to Chinese torture to drag information out and even at times you are put on further hold and either you pass out from exhaustion or the phone company decides enough is enough and cuts the call!

Here is interesting bit of information for you sufferers - the Deccan air number doesn't give you the option to talk to an Customer care rep, until you queue in a wrong flight number (Thank god I typed wrong). And I wish none of you have to contact that airline for anything like cancellation or refund, because then they are worst then politicians - they don't even make PROMISES to give you anything!

There are also the customer care services for some Government facilities like BSNL, MTNL, Cell One. In these cases, if you are lucky you get a happy person. Otherwise, the moment you have finished your first question, you are told "We can't do it, go to the nearest office" and then they hang up on you.

And folks, if any of you think that things are fine and dandy in abroad, like in the U.S., dream on! Customer cares the world over are the same- may be for the reason that most Customer Care services there are routed through India!! But even when I spoke to local CC reps there, I met with the usual cryptic, vague answers which showed either the person didn't know or couldn't be bothered to service me. If you want to read this piece again, press *..ha ha sorry couldn't resist.

Hey if this piece intrigues you, I suggest you find "The Callcenter Movie" on the net and watch it. Its hilarious.