This should be the tag line for our dear airline, for every time I have flown it I have come come away with real gems of memories. Take for instance this last trip that I took to England. My experience started with an mix up about immigration even before flying. Despite several calls to make sure, we ended up thinking our immigration will be from Mumbai and not Hyderabad, from where we were starting our journey. But half way through the ticketing process I realized the man in the counter was handing me the immigration forms as well. Inquiries revealed a casually spoken "of course the immigration is here at Hyderabad". I looked at my watch. 8.40. Our flight is leaving at 9.20. OK, don't panic. I looked at the immigration counters. Six counters and not a single passenger. My blood pressure crawled back into control. My hubby didn't have the same calming effect as the ticket-man kept asking him monosyllabic questions - "London?" (we interpreted it was an inquiry about our final destination) Mumbai? (umm....yeah i guess) "Aisle?" At this my husband kept repeating "adjoining seats, understand adjoining seats..we want to seat side by side"..blame in on an earlier Air India experience.Not to mention the our flight number showed New York and not Mumbai as destination.
Anyways, we managed to get our tickets, pass through immigration and board the plane, which turned out to a very old Airbus 320. I remember flying those when I was very young. The food trays were aptly scuffed and scarred and hanging loosely in some cases. The exit door had weird stains on it and the interior resembled a luxury bus plying the Hyderabad to Tirupati road.
But, thanks to the aviation god, whoever it is, we reached Mumbai in one piece. After much searching for a parking spot at the international airport (I cannot single out Air India for this though) out tiny craft was disdainfully shoved out of the way of the Lufthansa's and Pacific's and parked into a dark and dingy corner. We piled into a bus and were ferried to the terminal where we finally zigged and zagged our way into the security checking.
We had a long long wait in Mumbai so we hunkered down at gate number 6 with hot chocolates and samosas to spend the time. With about an hour to go, the speakers blared with an innocuous, mildly voiced "all people flying the air India flight AI*** please make way to gate number 3". The result was a not so innocuous stampede. My husband took off like a bat out of hell and when I finally caught up to him I realized the reason for it. He had found us the last two adjoining seats near the new gate.
Of the rest of the great Indian travelers queued up in front of the gate with more then an hour to go. With no one to clarify, every new comer joined the line. After a long long time, someone half-heartedly tried to explain that boarding would commence at usual time but by then all seats were filled so people continued to stand.
And then finally the boarding began with this announcement, "..ahem...passengers traveling in air india flight AI*** (pause)..we will now board the flight in the following order, seat 52-25 followed by 24-10-followed by......." Now without anyone clarifying how this "followed by" should be managed, everybody cued up and started shoving against each other. We gave the mob ample time to build up the chaos and then slipped through the mil-lee to board much before seat number 52 (if you can't beat them, join them)
On boarding, the first thing I noticed is the plane smelled pleasantly like a public toilet in India. After managing to hold my breath till being seated I ripped open the blanket and stuffed in right up my nose. Thankfully someone sprayed the air freshener and things became more bearable.
I switched on the in-flight entertainment to realize no one has updated it after 2002 and went gave up in favor of a snooze. But the remote, which was placed conveniently at the side of my elbow kept switching on the monitor every time I moved. And we will skip over all the other snippets of experience as that will make this blog too long.
Although I add to this my brother's experience, when he flew AI last week from US. In his own words, the seat moved back enough to cover the width of a slim phone, the pillow was about the size of a spectacle case and everyone elbowed their neighbor each time they took a bit of the food.
And we echo our thoughts "This is the last time I am flying Air India!" I really hate being glared at by matronly air hostesses for no fault of my own!
7 comments:
Poor poor Meeaaawwwooo! Please fly Jet or anyone else for that matter henceforth. But don't know how will you beat the immigration though! Hmmm???
I am yet to fly Air India.. this time considering Ethihad or American Airlines.. Better luck next time..
All's well that ends well. Thanks to Air India for feeding well and hiring some young and pleasantly speeched crew wearing lovely Saris. The truly Distinctly Indian carrier and at really affordable prices. Cheers.
calm your nerves meeaawwoo. You have a co-sufferer here with a book to fill in with woes of travelling Air India. When I flew Air India from Delhi to US, I was told 8 hours before the flight that we will fly via Mumbai. then 4 hours before the flight I was told that we are flying from Delhi which brought me back to the original time but 2 hours earlier than the Mumbai schedule. Imagine the panick when on the last moment I was planning to relax and had to rush to the airport without double checking my last moment things. Then I flew till London without a pillow and blanket as there weren't enough of them. my poor jacket worked overtime as a blanket-cum-pillow. At London we were to board another AI flight to New York and the transition got delayed by 3 hours. The AI authorities shoved people like a herd of cattle and kept makng rude remarks to passengers. When we showed discontent at their behaviour they said that we should be greatful to AI for haulting the flight to New York for us or we would have been forced to fly anyother airline at any other day or time. While waiting, the horrible experiences of co-passengers gave me jitters.
It doesn't end here. While coming back from US my husband was with me and he didn't want any hot drinks the crew offered. One of the 'nice' hosts brought him tomato juice and peladed him to drink. When my hubby said he doesn't want that either, the host actually made a cheap rude remark for not having what was being offered.
There's loads and loads of it. I wish AI was again taken over by Tata or just scrapped off from the face of India.
Your article has provoked so many bad memories travelling from India to elsewhere that if I don't stop here we could create a blog dedicated only to Air India.
Oh dear dear Abha, that's truely horrendous. I have to say though they are better in the UK-India sector. My brother just flew back to US and AI has lost all their luggage in India. Other, as he said, the flight was ok. The rude remarks have at least stopped. Can't be rude while the bulk of yuor pay is being chopped for making up the losses :-) Now the air hostesses smile as if they are constipated you know...poor things..such an effort. I will fly jet next time to spare them.
The darned "in flight entertainment" remote controls the overhead reading lights and the cabin crew "call" buttons. It was initially funny watching the reading lights and the crew-call lights light come on and off with passengers moving in their seats, but after a while it got old.
For a couple of hundred dollars premium, i will take a different carrier. Ended up spending $300 to get the better connecting flight at JFK since AI cannot guarantee a connection for a 3 hour layover (speak of confidence in their punctuality). Did get the 3 pieces of luggage back though, mostly due to the persistence of Delta.
Ever fly American Airlines? At least you get saris and food with flavor that isn't salt and/or butter. But they are the cheapest.
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